Missing Maxie: The Heart of Grief

I don’t typically reveal who my clients are, and I hold their private information in the strictest confidence. However, in certain rare cases, a client will have an important story to share which I believe can be helpful to many others. Such is the case with Abby Leviss who has written a heart-warming account about her experience with my astrological services. Abby posts a daily blog about her son, Maxie, who tragically passed away at nine and a half months suddenly and without warning while at daycare. In her posts, Abby shares stories about beautiful Maxie, the challenges of life without him, and about life with Maxie’s little brother Mo, who was born a year and two days after Max’s death. Thank you for sharing this, Abby. Here’s to Maxie!

Monday, September 24, 2012

My Astrological Forecast

What if you could know your own future? Would you even want to know what was in store for you? What if you could know whether you would find the love of your life? Or whether that love would last? Have you ever been curious about whether you are following the right career path or if you will have financial success in the future? These days I have a one track mind about my future – and it all revolves around the loss of our Maxie. I need to know that Mo and our future children will live. I need to know that Teddy will live to a ripe old age as well. I need to know that there will be a time when life won’t feel so oppressive and overwhelming. I need to know that we will be with Max again.

Several months ago, another bereaved mother reached out to me. She has been on this road without her daughter for ten years now. Her daughter was two when she passed away. This mother is one of the most healed bereaved parents I have interacted with. She found my blog after I attended the afterlife conference in Phoenix. I have emailed back and forth with her many times about what therapies and experiences helped her the most. For her, it was doing an out of box therapy for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder called EMDR (Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing), having a personal reading with the famous medium John Holland (which is how she found my blog – he posted a link to my post about the conference experience on his Facebook page), and having her astrological chart done by a Vedic astrologer. I had never heard of Vedic astrology before so I asked her a bunch of questions about how it could have possibly helped. I have never been into Western astrology, other than to read my horoscope in a magazine from time to time and forget it seconds later. What she told me about this ancient Indian practice of astrology was very interesting.

In India, Vedic astrology is considered a science. You can actually study it at the university level and major in it. It is so much a part of the accepted belief system in fact that Indians will not get married or start a new business without first consulting the astrological charts. India’s independence was not declared until the stars aligned just so. My bereaved mother friend explained to me that having charts done for her and her deceased daughter convinced her that there is a bigger picture to life that we cannot understand…that much of her life as she knew it had been predetermined. That isn’t to say that there is no belief in free will. In fact, followers can often find out about health, financial and relationship issues from looking at their charts and astrologers will prescribe remedies to cope with the issues that might come up. None of it is set in stone.

I felt sufficiently intrigued to set up a personal reading with Juliana Swanson, the same astrologer who did my friend’s chart ten years ago. And now you really think I’ve lost it.  I’ll admit, the whole thing sounded incredibly far out but I am in an experimental phase. I am seeking out unconventional practices to help me explain to myself this most unbelievable loss of mine. What I can tell you is that my experience with Juliana was way beyond my wildest expectations. She spent hours preparing charts for me, Maxie and Mo based on our dates, times, and locations of our births. Juliana talked about the cycles of my life, correctly designating several distinct phases I have gone through: one leading up to my parents split when I was eight or nine, one beginning at the age of 35 with my marriage to Ted and then a couple in between. She spoke with me about my strengths and weaknesses both personally and professionally and she was right on.

I took lots of notes and read them back to Ted afterwards who kept saying, “She KNOWS you!”. She suggested that I should pursue a career in either non profit work or therapy if I was not already on either of those paths. She believed I would focus my attention in the areas of disaster relief, death and dying, women and children issues and refugee issues (which happen to be the issues that I am most interested in). My chart indicated that there was a strong likelihood of my losing a child and Maxie’s chart indicated a strong likelihood for a short lifespan. Mo’s chart, on the other hand, had many combinations for longevity. She told me that she saw a need for me to get acupuncture for my liver quarterly and that I need to be vigilant about doing breast exams. She suggested that I read “Autobiography of a Yogi” by Paramahansa Yogananda (the founder of the Self Realization Center at Lake Shrine) as part of her prescription. She also saw another birth coming up for us.  Likely a girl, she said, but perhaps even twins.  

I honestly still don’t know what to make of it all but I believe that I will be coming back to this experience many times in my life. Most importantly, my take away was something that she kept telling me repeatedly about Mo – that his biggest challenge would be the legacy of Maxie. She told me over and over that it is important that we make sure he knows how loved he is and that his brother’s death has nothing to do with him….that he is just as important to us and that we love all of our children equally. That broke my heart and renewed my awareness to concentrate so much love on Mo and his life. There is nothing that I can do to bring back my Maxie. But there is so much I can do to ensure that my Mo is a happy and loved boy.

In the meantime, I am not going to say that the reading answered all of my questions and wrapped the case up for me in any kind of an explainable way, but I am humbled enough by Maxie’s death to say that I am open to the fact that there is much in this life that doesn’t make sense and that I don’t understand. I am open to learning about all of the various ways that people make sense of this world and this life. I am open to the idea that perhaps we are all part of a bigger plan of sorts. All I can honestly say is that I really don’t know but am finding the journey to be enlightening.

Republished with permission from Missie Maxie Blogspot.


 

Fall 2012 Astral Weather Report

During the equinoxes, the Sun at 0 degrees of declination appears to be passing right over the celestial equator. Tropical astrologers consider that the Sun moves into the sign of Libra around the time of the fall equinox, but because sidereal astrologers track the movement of the planetary bodies against the actual constellations, and because of the precession of the equinoxes, the Sun is no longer moving into the true constellation of Libra on the fall equinox. Instead, it is currently found at almost 6 degrees in the constellation of Virgo. It will not enter the constellation of Libra until mid-October. If you want to understand the issue of the two zodiacs more in depth, I highly recommend that you read Robert Powell’s History of the Zodiac and Hermetic Astrology (the latter in two volumes). Continue reading

2012 Shift

A Mayan great cycle culminates on December 21, 2012. There has been a lot of hype about this being the end of the world, which I do not believe. On this date that marks the end of one particular Mayan calendar, the Sun will also move into direct alignment with the equator of our Milky Way Galaxy, an alignment that occurs only once in every 26,000 years. To be more accurate, because the Sun’s disk as seen from Earth covers about a half a degree in width, the Sun’s disk at winter solstice makes this contact with the galactic center over a 36-year period from 1980 to 2016. Since the 1980s, the world has already gone through a deep transformation as the pace of life continues to speed up; the world population keeps on growing exponentially; and humanity has become increasingly connected through instantaneous worldwide communication, economic and social globalization, and ecological crisis. Perhaps 2012 is simply the peak of this massive wave of change, as many authors have speculated.

Continue reading

Blue Moon Magic!

As mentioned in my Vedic New Year blog, “… there is a very special and auspicious event happening in one of the Vedic calendars, from August 18 to September 16, called Bhadrapad Adhika Masa, which means that there will be two lunar months in a row when the Sun will not transit to another sign, and when the New Moon will occur twice in the sidereal sign of Leo. This happens because of the difference between the solar and lunar calendars (365 versus 354 days per year), which means that every ~2.5 years, an extra (intercalary) lunar month needs to be added. During this fortunate time of the Nandana Year, special prayers and pujas are performed by the Hindu priests, thus enhancing harmony between the spiritual and material worlds.” Continue reading

Happy Lunar New Year!

Happy Lunar New Year! In the Vedic tradition of astrology, there are many different calendars and systems of reckoning time (kaala chakra). One of the most commonly used methods to determine the New Year is based on the astro-chart for the New Moon in Pisces, which occurs around the Spring Equinox every year, this year on March 22, 2012, at 10:37:05 AM in Washington, DC.  This chart is known as the Chaitra Shukla Pratipada. For anyone wanting to know more about the New Year chart, astrologer Steve Stuckey has written an outstanding article published by both Jyotish Star and Saptarishis Astrology.[i]

Samvatsara is a Sanskrit term for “year.” In the Vedic system, there are 60 samvatsaras. The South Indian calculations for the samvatsaras are different from those in North India, and there are also two different ways of ordering the years, but most astrologers today use Sage Varahamahira’s method. Continue reading

Mars-Sun Opposition Exact 03/03/12

Mars, astrological planet of energy, passion, obstacles and war, is still retrograde and also very close to aphelion. When a planet is at aphelion it moves more slowly than normal. This makes its essence more pronounced, though it is more internalized because it is retrograde. On March 3, 2012, the Earth will pass between the Sun and Mars, bringing Mars to exact opposition with the Sun, further intensifying the essence of Mars. Continue reading

New Moon in Aquarius Feb. 21, 2012

New Moon in (sidereal) Aquarius…Tuesday, Feb. 21 at 5:34:34 PM EST. Time to celebrate Fat Tuesday, AKA Mardi Gras (Carnival), the day before Ash Wednesday which begins the Lenten season of fasting in the Christian Church. Mardi Gras is also known as Shrove Tuesday, the day of confession, yes, but also a day for eating sweet pancakes and other sinfully delectable foods before the fast of Lent begins. Continue reading

Venus and the Venereal Game

A pride of lions; a school of fish; a leap of leopards; a parliament of owls; a shrewdness of apes; a clowder of cats; an unkindness of ravens…are “terms of venery, colorful collective nouns that evolved in the Middle Ages of Europe when the sophisticated art of hunting demanded an equally sophisticated vocabulary.”…from one of my all-time favorite books given to me by my mother long ago, James Lipton’s An Exaltation of Larks or the Venereal Game. The venereal game is not directly related to the term “venereal disease,” though both are similarly linked to Venus, goddess and astrological indicator of love and wild animals. Continue reading

Deflation or Inflation? Saturn and Ketu in Venus-Ruled Signs

Saturn is transiting in sidereal Libra currently, and Ketu (the Moon’s South Node) is transiting in sidereal Taurus, both signs belonging to Venus, which in mundane astrology symbolizes currency and its circulation, banks, stock exchange, commodity and cattle markets, revenue and securities, etc. Continue reading

Mars Retrograde Cycle: Sparking inner fire, valor and drive to get the work done

Kuja (Mars) is the graha that signifies our efforts to find security in a world that is often fraught with danger, upheaval and loss. In relation to our view from Earth, Kuja will become completely stationary (vikal) from Jan. 23-25, after which it will retrograde (vakra) from Jan. 25 until April 15 (tax day :)). When a graha is stationary it is the strongest, and when retrograde it is also very strong. Kuja’s manifestations can be “good” and/or “bad” depending on its placement and various aspects in the natal, mundane and transit horoscopes. Continue reading